Ulster Film Office hates zombie films. Despises them. Loathes them. Very very nearly but not quite as much as it hates 12 year olds. Inhuman monsters. Devils.
The worst thing that could ever happen in this world would be if a 12 year old actually made a zombie film. Imagine what unholy evil would be shat into existence if a 12 year old made their own zombie film. I can’t even..
But that could never happen. could it? In what cruel godless universe of perversion could a 12 year old be allowed to make any film, let alone one about zombies, full of not just zombies, but a whole horde of other 12 year olds, pretending to be zombies?
That just can’t happen.
It just can’t.